Scarlett's Diary
by Real Life Racie
Summary: Can be used as a companion to Royals. Scarlett writes an account of her lonely days in exile with her screwball family. Current: Scarlett learns a vulgar new way to express herself
1. A Reckless Disobedient Child

25th day of November

Dear Diary,

I've returned from my week at the Hatter's. He made me a lovely hat that looks like a heart shaped teacup. He won't stop speaking ill of my mother, calling her strange names I've never heard before in my 14 years in this mad world, but immediately file as insults in my mind.

I've also met somebody. His name is Alexander Kingsley, son of THE Alice. He is also my brother's sworn nemesis. Hayden says he's an intruder and doesn't know I've met him. Ches says he's known to be quite vexing and irksome. Even so, the champion's son said I was pretty. I like to be called pretty. Hayden says words like that are cheap and that if someone says I'm pretty it doesn't mean they'd die for me.

As much as I hate to admit it, I think Alexander is quite handsome. However he's Hayden's age. I almost regret lying to him that I'm a refugee trapped in my own mother's dungeon named Anastasia. But If he knew who I really was, it would be dangerous. Hayden would be furious if he knew I were fraternizing with somebody like that and mother would go into hysterics, and they'd both want his head.

Today while playing with my dolls and my guillotine, I overheard Hayden telling Chessia that I am reckless. I don't know what that means. He says mother is insane and I shouldn't look up to her. He's just jealous because mother always wanted a daughter. I wish she would spend more time with us instead of sulking in her wing of the castle. Ches said that I was smart, but of course I already know that. Mum says I'm very bright and I know I am because she told me so and she's never wrong.

I'll write again soon, Diary.

-Imperial Princess Scarlett of Witzend


	2. Trapped in the Closet

Dear Diary,

Hayden had a surprise for me in his closet today. I thought it would be a puppy. Or a pony. Either would've been nice. I just wanted a pet. But instead I saw Alexander Kingsleigh in his closet all tied up and unconscious. Hayden found out that I asked him for directions. Hayden wasn't pleased with me. That made me sad. I don't like it when my brother is angry or disappointed with me. But I now understand that what I did was wrong and put both of us and our mother in jeopardy, so I had to be disciplined.

First, Hayden scolded me for talking to Mother's enemy.

Then, he woke the Champion's son up and made me tell him the truth. That my real name was Scarlett and my mother was the Red Queen and that I wasn't supposed to leave where I'm from.

Then I was ordered to tell Kingsleigh that I had no feelings for him whatsoever. I've never felt love for anyone but my mother, or Hayden, or Ches. We'd only spoken once. All I thought was that this guy was cute and he called me pretty. My brother shouldn't presume these things all the time! How am I going to get a boyfriend with Hayden being my guard dog anyway?

The Champion's son seemed hurt by what I did, but honestly it was pretty stupid of him to get lured into the Outlands by my brother. You can't get past Hayden. Believe me, I've tried.

For now, our prisoner is still trapped in the closet. We needed to decide what to do with him before anyone finds out he's gone missing. Hayden wanted his head, but I wanted to shrink him and put him in a little jar with some air holes punched into the top as a pet. For now we're agreeing to disagree.

We've made my lapse in judgement work to our advantage and devised a plan to overthrow Aunt Mirana's corrupted government. We're going to use Alexander Kingsleigh as bait to lure people here and then we'll strike. Then my mother will be queen again and everything will be alright.


	3. Giving Underland the Finger

Dear Diary,

My mother yells "OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!" whenever she wants someone executed. So does my brother. I used to do that for awhile but then I realized that all the shouting hurt my throat. I hate most types of tea, so I've decided to try not to yell unless it's completely necessary.

I've discovered a revolutionary new thing to do. Ches taught it to me. It strikes fear into the hearts of everyone who sees me and they know never to cross me, without my even having to say (or yell) a word! All I do is stick my fist out in front of me and stick my middle finger in the air. Sometimes I drag the finger across my throat for extra flair, a personal touch and reference to my roots.

I showed my middle finger to our cook today when he wouldn't let me have tarts for breakfast. He looked shocked and horrified, but gave me what I wanted nonetheless. I showed it to my governess when she said I was being stupid and spoiled and that I needed a good spanking. Then I dismissed her from the household. She left the room after blushing furiously. I even showed it to Hayden when he agreed with my governess that I was stupid and spoiled. He wasn't pleased and sent me to bed without supper. He wanted to know who taught me such a dirty trick but my lips were sealed.

I'm very hungry right now, but learning The Finger is the best thing that's happened to me all week! Tonight I'll dream about showing both Fingers to my aunt if I'm forced to visit her again.


	4. Mummy Loves Uncle Tick Tock

_**Chapter 4: Mummy Loves Uncle Tick Tock**_

Dear Diary,

Mummy has a special friend visiting her. He thinks I'm a kindergartener. But I'm 14, and I'm homeschooled. Then again, he also thinks Hayden's a kindergartener. He's funny. Mummy calls him Tick Tock, so I call him Uncle Tick Tock. He brings me cool presents because I blackmailed him to. My favorite is called TV. It's from the future he says. Hayden has one too. It's like a magic mirror but it shows you funny stuff. I learn a lot from it.

Tick Tock stays at our castle a lot more often now, like Ches does sometimes and weird noises come from their room like mummy giggling and the bed creaking stuff like that. I asked Hayden what if he knew what they were doing but he said he'd tell me when I was older. I've heard him and Ches do it too, but when I walked in, I saw them bouncing on each other and I left because they weren't wearing any clothes.

Mummy is happier than she's been in a long time. Sometimes she'll spend time with us when Uncle Tick Tock is around. We have tea parties, play poker, and ride horses. It's a lot of fun. But he never gives her his Chronosphere which is what she really wants. He uses it to travel through Time. He says he's Time. She's not going to put a ring on it until she gets the chronosphere. Besides, the "M" word scares her. By that I mean "Marriage," not "mutiny," "muchness," or "marmoreal." Hayden says she's afraid of commitment and being cheated on. I would be too. Hayden's dad was a filthy cheater and womanizer. He deserved to be executed.

That's all for now, Diary. I'll write again, soon.


	5. Don't End Up Like Juliet

_**Chapter 5: Don't End Up Like Juliet**_

Dear Diary,

I felt bad about shrinking Alexander Kingsleigh. I tried to get Hayden to release me but he convinced me he has to be locked up. He told me a scary story from the Aboveland called Romeo and Juliet. It's about a pretty lady named Juliet, who was only a year younger than me. She's really stupid and she falls in love with the son of her family's enemy, Romeo and he kills her brother, drives her insane and makes her poison herself so he can use her dead body like his own private rag doll and eat her when he's bored. He says it's a true story. I think it's true as well. What does Hayden have to gain from lying to me? He told me about the evil monster inside me that wakes up every month and makes me bleed…

So I decided to keep the Champion's son in captivity before he can take advantage of me or brainwash me or eat my rotting flesh after I die. Because I'm smarter than Juliet and I'm not going to let my emotions make me weak. So now I put the jar I put him in under my bed so he can't see me getting dressed or anything, and I feed him crumbs every couple days. He isn't my pet, he's my prisoner. If I did have a pet, I'd be nicer to it because it wouldn't act like Romeo or the stupid champion that got us banished.

Until next Time, Diary.


	6. Nanny Stella is a Stupid Cow

**Chapter 6: Nanny Stella is a Stupid Cow**

Dear Diary,

Aunt Mirana sent a nanny from the Aboveland that I saw on my TV to watch Hayden and I. How dare she! We're perfectly capable of looking after ourselves. She tried to use "psychology" on us, whatever that is. She came in and told us to do chores. We never do chores! We have a staff! I'm an imperial princess, not a common handmaid! So I told her that. She took my favorite dagger Hayden gave me, took his cards, and told us she wouldn't let us ride our horses until we did the dishes. It wasn't fair.

Naturally we refused, and then the stupid cow made us sit on these tuffets in the servants quarters for something called "Time out." She said our behavior wasn't acceptable. This was insulting our upbringing, which was insulting our mother! So Hayden told her that if she had a problem with how we do things, she'd just have to go to Mum's chamber and talk it out with her. He also instructed her not to knock, just to jump in and be very direct and not sugar coat everything. He's a genius.

The Evil Nanny caught Mummy spending quality Time with Uncle Tick Tock. Mummy was furious. Not only was she interrupted, but she was being told how to raise us. Nobody tells our mum what to do. So she had stupid Nanny Stella executed and had her head fastened to a spike in front of the castle as a warning to others. Let's hope Aunt Mirana doesn't bring another nanny./span/p


End file.
